My rules of life
Rule No. 1 : Never Outperform your boss : Everyone has insecurities. When you show yourself in the world and display your talent, you naturally stir up all kinds of resentment, envy, and other manifestations of insecurity. This is to be expected. You cannot spend your life worrying about petty feelings of others. With those above you, however you must take a different approach. When it comes to power, outperforming the boss is perhaps the worst mistake of all.
Those who attain high standing in life are kings and queens: they want to feel secure in their positions and superior to those around them in intelligence, wit and charm. It is deadly but common misperception to believe that by displaying and showing your talent, you are winning the boss’s affection. He may appreciate you in public but at his first opportunity he will replace you with someone less intelligent, less attractive and less threatening. Your boss is like sun. There can be many stars but can only be one sun at time. Never obscure the sunlight or rival the sun’s brilliance, but rather fade into the sky and find ways to heighten the master star’s intensity. If you are naturally more sociable and generous than your master, be careful not to be cloud that blocks his radiance from others. He must appear as the sun around which everyone revolves, radiating power and brilliance, the centre of attention. If you are more intelligent than your boss, for example seem the opposite: Make him appear more intelligent than you. Act Naive. Make it seem that you need his expertise. By letting others outshine you, you remain in control instead of being victim of their insecurity. Ego massage is must in today’s environment. However most of companies deny the fact that promotions happen due to ego massage but in reality things are different and it’s high time that we accept the truth rather than running away from truth.
Those who attain high standing in life are kings and queens: they want to feel secure in their positions and superior to those around them in intelligence, wit and charm. It is deadly but common misperception to believe that by displaying and showing your talent, you are winning the boss’s affection. He may appreciate you in public but at his first opportunity he will replace you with someone less intelligent, less attractive and less threatening. Your boss is like sun. There can be many stars but can only be one sun at time. Never obscure the sunlight or rival the sun’s brilliance, but rather fade into the sky and find ways to heighten the master star’s intensity. If you are naturally more sociable and generous than your master, be careful not to be cloud that blocks his radiance from others. He must appear as the sun around which everyone revolves, radiating power and brilliance, the centre of attention. If you are more intelligent than your boss, for example seem the opposite: Make him appear more intelligent than you. Act Naive. Make it seem that you need his expertise. By letting others outshine you, you remain in control instead of being victim of their insecurity. Ego massage is must in today’s environment. However most of companies deny the fact that promotions happen due to ego massage but in reality things are different and it’s high time that we accept the truth rather than running away from truth.
Rule No.2 : Do not trust your office friends, learn how to use enemies : Be wary of friends – they will betray you more quickly for they are easily aroused to envy. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. Its better to hire a enemy because he will be more loyal than your friend because he has more to prove. Infact you have more to fear from friends than from enemies. If you have no enemies, find a way to make them. It is natural to employ your friends when you find yourself in times of need. The world is harsh place and your friends soften the harshness. Besides you know them. Why depend on a stranger when you have friend at hand. The problem is that you often do not know your friends as well as you imagine. Friends often agree in order to avoid an argument. They cover up their unpleasant qualities so as to not offend each other. They laugh extra hard at each other’s jokes. Since honesty rarely strengthens friendship, you may never know how a friend truly feels. Friends at office will say that they love your poetry, adore your music, envy your taste in clothes – may be they mean it often they do not. There was another colleague of mine who use to act as my best friend but the game he used to play at my back was unimaginable. All working place require a kind of distance between two people. You are in office to work not make friends. Friendliness ( real or false) only obscures the fact. Your enemies on the other hand are an untapped goldmine that you must learn to exploit. You would never put a finger in a lions mouth, because you know what will happen if you put a finger. With friends you have no such fear and if you hire them they will eat you alive with ingratitude. I have experienced this and I mean it.
The wise man profits more from his enemies then a fool from his friends ( Balstar Gracian 1601- 1658).
Rule No. 3 : Mask your real intentions : Keep people off balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. If they have no clue what are you up to, they cannot prepare a defense. Guide them far enough down the wrong path, envelop them in the wrong smoke, act as duffer….. and by the time they realize your intentions it will be too late………. You will be out of their life. Most people are open books ( people think that I am open book but unfortunately I am not). They say what they feel, they blurt out their opinion at every opportunity and constantly reveal their plan and intentions. They do this for several reasons. First it is easy and natural to always want to talk about one’s feelings and plans for the future. It takes effort to control your tongue and monitor what you reveal. Secondly many people believe that by being honest and open they are winning people’s heart and showing their good nature. They are greatly deluded. Honesty is actually a blunt knife which bloodies more than it cuts. Your honesty is likely to offend people, it is much more prudent to tailor your words, telling people what they want to hear rather than telling them hard, ugly truth of what you feel or think. I have experienced this so if you want to survive in this world ,do not tell the truth, hide your real intentions. Talk endlessly your desires and goals ( not real goals). Remember: It takes patience and humility to dull your brilliant colors , to put on mask of inconspicuous. Do not be scared of wearing such bland mask – it is often your un readability that draws people to you and makes you appear a person of power.
Rule No. 3 : Mask your real intentions : Keep people off balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. If they have no clue what are you up to, they cannot prepare a defense. Guide them far enough down the wrong path, envelop them in the wrong smoke, act as duffer….. and by the time they realize your intentions it will be too late………. You will be out of their life. Most people are open books ( people think that I am open book but unfortunately I am not). They say what they feel, they blurt out their opinion at every opportunity and constantly reveal their plan and intentions. They do this for several reasons. First it is easy and natural to always want to talk about one’s feelings and plans for the future. It takes effort to control your tongue and monitor what you reveal. Secondly many people believe that by being honest and open they are winning people’s heart and showing their good nature. They are greatly deluded. Honesty is actually a blunt knife which bloodies more than it cuts. Your honesty is likely to offend people, it is much more prudent to tailor your words, telling people what they want to hear rather than telling them hard, ugly truth of what you feel or think. I have experienced this so if you want to survive in this world ,do not tell the truth, hide your real intentions. Talk endlessly your desires and goals ( not real goals). Remember: It takes patience and humility to dull your brilliant colors , to put on mask of inconspicuous. Do not be scared of wearing such bland mask – it is often your un readability that draws people to you and makes you appear a person of power.
Rule No. 4 : Guard your reputation : So when I asked my dad after his retirement that “what have you earned in service to the nation?”. He says “ I have earned reputation”.
Reputation is the cornerstone of power. Through reputation alone you can intimidate and win; once it slips however you are vulnerable and will be attacked from all sides. Make your reputation unassailable. Always be alert to potential attacks and thwart them before they happen. Meanwhile learn to destroy your enemies by opening holes in their own reputations. They stand aside and let public opinion hang them. A solid reputation increases your presence and exaggerates your strengths without your having to spend much energy. It can also create an aura around you that will instill respect, even fear. Reputation is a mine of diamonds and rubies. You dug for it, you found it, and your wealth is now assured. Guard it with your life. Robbers and thieves will appear from all sides. Never take your wealth for granted and constantly renew it – time will diminish the jewel luster and bury them from sight.
Rule No. 5 : Use absence to increase respect and honor : Too much circulation makes the price go down. The more you are seen and heard from, the more common you appear. If you are already established in a group temporary withdraw from it will make you more talked about, even more admired. You must learn when to leave. Create value through scarcity.
Everything in the world depends on absence and presence. There is saying “Out of the sight is out of mind” but it is not true. A strong presence will draw power and attention to you. You shine more brightly than those around you. But there is time where too much pressure creates opposite effect. The more you are seen and heard from, the more your value degrades, and you become a habit. No matter how hard you try to be different, subtly, not knowing why, people respect you less and less. At the right moment you must learn to withdraw yourself, before they unconsciously push you away. It is game of hide and seek. Master this game. Imagine yourself as “ SUN” It can only be appreciated by its absence. The longer the days of rain, the more the sun is craved. But too many hot days and the sun overwhelms. Learn to keep yourself obscure and make people demand your return.
Please note that all the above rules are interpretation of my experience. Please do not take it personally and it is not aimed to hurt anyone.
Reputation is the cornerstone of power. Through reputation alone you can intimidate and win; once it slips however you are vulnerable and will be attacked from all sides. Make your reputation unassailable. Always be alert to potential attacks and thwart them before they happen. Meanwhile learn to destroy your enemies by opening holes in their own reputations. They stand aside and let public opinion hang them. A solid reputation increases your presence and exaggerates your strengths without your having to spend much energy. It can also create an aura around you that will instill respect, even fear. Reputation is a mine of diamonds and rubies. You dug for it, you found it, and your wealth is now assured. Guard it with your life. Robbers and thieves will appear from all sides. Never take your wealth for granted and constantly renew it – time will diminish the jewel luster and bury them from sight.
Rule No. 5 : Use absence to increase respect and honor : Too much circulation makes the price go down. The more you are seen and heard from, the more common you appear. If you are already established in a group temporary withdraw from it will make you more talked about, even more admired. You must learn when to leave. Create value through scarcity.
Everything in the world depends on absence and presence. There is saying “Out of the sight is out of mind” but it is not true. A strong presence will draw power and attention to you. You shine more brightly than those around you. But there is time where too much pressure creates opposite effect. The more you are seen and heard from, the more your value degrades, and you become a habit. No matter how hard you try to be different, subtly, not knowing why, people respect you less and less. At the right moment you must learn to withdraw yourself, before they unconsciously push you away. It is game of hide and seek. Master this game. Imagine yourself as “ SUN” It can only be appreciated by its absence. The longer the days of rain, the more the sun is craved. But too many hot days and the sun overwhelms. Learn to keep yourself obscure and make people demand your return.
Please note that all the above rules are interpretation of my experience. Please do not take it personally and it is not aimed to hurt anyone.
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