Secrets Of Boardroom

Well Boardroom is suppose to be place where discussions, arguments, firing, appraisal  happens.

It’s the most sacred room which contains many secrets, consumes much information and has dark secrets of many products, people.

1.       Almost all the discussions in the boardroom are Staged.

2.       90% of time chalk and board is not used in the boardroom.

3.       Abuses are common in Boardroom.

4.       Behind the professionalism, we see casual BC,MC in Boardroom

5.       And if someone from other department enters the boardroom, we smile and act that our department is family, love and bonded till 6 pm Monday to Friday.

6.       The Chair is chaired by everyone in the boardroom.

7.       Usually there is one Sun in the boardroom

8.       Fresher’s are prohibited. It comes with tag for freshers “ Do not Enter” or “Enter at your own risk”.

9.       Negotiations are prestaged

a.       If you are invited for dinner after negotiation then deal is half done. Half will be done after dinner and drink. Almost done status for such negotiation.

b.      IF you leave the negotiation in between, you got the deal.

c.       If you hear we will get back, it means “ GoodBye”

Examples of staged discussions are

A B2C product guy received many complain about the product and product is in red flag by customer care then there is meeting between boss and subordinate. The subordinate calls the vendor for the meeting. Then MC BC happens between vendor and subordinate ( All Staged). They all were part of the crime of escalated customer complaint. They all know why there is increase in customer complains but to show the management they act they are naïve.

 

Your appraisal discussion.

My appraisals usually use to begin with smile and ended with same smile. This proves there is no room for discussion.

FishMarket Discussion

When many vendors enters in one room and then there is argument among vendors, subvendor and as I mentioned in the previous write up “ The argument is usually won by political connection within the organization or department therefore we can say relationship is key in the boardroom.

Take Away

Come to Office. Give 100% to your work. Leave Office. Avoid Boardroom with boss. Always use Boardroom for every discussion where You are the Sun, You are the boss.

IF you ask me most of the things are known to the professionals still they go in wrong direction. Its like case of Mahabharta . Lord Krishna knew about Mahabharta but still he could not stop MahAbharta. I feel the same. I know the future and I try to control the future but I am unable to control it and hence A power comes to destroy the wrong being. In other words YOU GUYS , THE WRONG GUYS HAVE MADE ME MOST POWERFUL PERSON WITHIN DEPARTMENT, IN LIFE. SO THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME POWER.

Boardroom exit has many faces

1.       Smile

2.       Angry

3.       Red

4.       Emotionless

5.       Laughing

Whatever your exit is …. Its room for next discussion.

Wait for my next write up.. as most boardroom exit is with handshake… so take care.. See You Soon.

 

Speech Given at JIMS & Great Lakes Institute of Management by Mypeepal Founder

Good Morning Professors, Staff & my friends of class 2017. It is an honor to stand before all of you today. When I was one of you in college studying I had passion to excel in everything I was connected to . Be it academics, Sports or any other activities. Like other classmates I wanted to fulfill my sense of intellectual curiosity. . Campus life brings out our competitive side, our independence & drive to push ourselves against all odds. When you leave college, these qualities will make you successful. Infact some of you will succeed, some of you will say " I want to rule the business world". I realized later in life after graduating that we all run for materialistic pleasure. We human beings are the finest creation of this planet earth. But this finest creation miserable condition in never ending search for peace & contentment poses a big question on its supremacy. We run after materialistic pleasure & seek for peace & contentment but peace & contentment keeps going farther & farther. The urge for more makes us crazy. The craze augments desire of craving & pushes us into competition where we struggle to be , what we are not. In our craze to achieve more & more we destroy our unique originality. The craze to own more & more turns into obsession.

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We start craving to be in charge of everything, every person in our life. We start attaching ourselves to possession . The love for possession swells & our false ego heightens to a maniac level. " I made this house" " I bought my car" " I won the elections". Here's I stand out in conversation thats the reason you will see many Indians like Sundar Pichai, Satya Nadella, etc doing very well outside India. We can say Indians are successful but India is not. The reason is Indians like Satya & Sundar dont deserve place like India because India is made up of bureaucrats, poor law & poor administration which kills the brain, innovation, enthusiasm to excel. 

However when you work in Team you should always think as "we". "We" stands for organization you will work for in future. When organization excel everyone of you will excel. So your objective of life should be to make your country, your company, your team excel. I would share an example of my career when i was in corporate Sales & I was designated as relationship Manager we were given targets. Few colleagues overachieved the targets, few under achieved the targets. I was in the category of "over achievers". I always overachieved. so my boss Raman Kumar who is Vice President in Vodafone always use to close my sales at a point when I achieved the given target & use to log extra sales to underachievers. As a team we excelled & this is the learning I would like to share with all of you. As hobby I had been taking Mathematics classes of Undergraduate level & students tells me not to share the important questions with their other classmates. I would say this is " demon" thinking. If you think good you will become good human being. & in competition  you kill others by scoring good marks not by distracting or making books unavailable.  

Always think big. When you start at an executive level or reach to CEO level later in life you should always be connected to big picture & should have planned vision to achieve bigger targets.  " Together we can" not "Alone I can" should be objective of your career. While studying in "B School" you would have got questions on case study saying " Suppose You are RBI Governor" " Suppose You are CEO of a company" & when you are about to sit for placement you start flying high thinking " I would be given the position of CEO or next to RBI Governor" but it doesn't happen like that. Corporate Life outside "B school" is pretty different. B school is preparing for you for what you would be in next 15 years not when you pass out from college. There is no shortcut to success & everyone has to climb the corporate ladder to reach the top. Everyone is not Mark Zuckerberg.( The founder of Face book). Do you know how a child is born ? Million of sperm come together & only 1 fertilize & is converted to baby. Mark Zuckerberg is that one sperm who saw success right after his graduation.

Suppose you decide to become entrepreneur right after graduation , you should not think India as your country. You should think Earth is your place of work. In  simple words you should think global. When you get into business you automatically become a global citizen. Suppose you are staying in Delhi & people ask you whets your native place ? You say , UP, Bihar, Andra Pradesh.. etc based on your birth place so when you become global citizen people will ask you " Which Country" ? & You can say " I am global citizen but I was born In India". 

There will be many lows & highs in life till you become CEO or RBI Governor. Take life as it comes. Don't push people, pull them & walk together. With this note I am going to start talking on topic which is new buzzword in technology " Augmented Reality"

To check the presentation on Augmented Reality click on the link below-  Augmented Reality Presentation

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An Idea Can Change Your Wife !

 " Idea" people say is the seed of a start up. An Idea is like currency when you invest in good idea it can make you rich. Have your never noticed when you search for " temperature" on Google it tells you 23 degree Celsius , 24 degree Celsius.... depending upon the temperature measured for the day but you feel its 5 degree Celsius much lower than what Google measured. We can say Google cant measure feelings. There lies a new product Tagline for Google " Search Your Feeling" Search Your degree of pain" !

Sometimes a small idea can bring million bucks. There is lot to learn from day to day life. Scarcity in any field can become an Idea. What people don't have or long to have becomes a new Idea so work on new Idea & make your product bigger & bigger. Ideation is very important part of  product development. If the ideation is not well thought other steps from launch to growth to maturity to decline will have shorter life cycle & that will lead to the death of your product in a shorter span of time ! Make Your product Big. Dream Big on the launch day & leave everything on your external customers ( Consumers) & internal Customers ( Your employees). The biggest strategy to any product launch is to hire best brain. If One gets the best resource the other steps falls in line automatically. " An IDEA CAN CHANGE YOUR WIFE" Interested to know how ? Hire best resource who can give you tips of separation & finally that will lead to your divorce. 

C U Soon Guys ! & Thanks for sharing feedback at 

Kamna@mypeepal.com ! Your  voice is bible to us. We appreciate praise as well as criticism.  Keep writing & do share your feedback about this write up. 

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Are you a Real Woman ?

One day after finishing the work Rachael was unwinding by checking her personal mails. Suddenly she saw a mail from an unknown person and he wrote in his signature “I am a fan”. Well she had a fan following of her blogs but she never thought that one day she will get such nice and heart touching mail. That was an Invite to become the speaker and the topic was “ Women - The change agents”. Well usually she doesn't like being a speaker because of public glare but this time the invitation was from “A fan” so she could not say no. She knows that being someones favorite is a“great responsibility” as she herself was fan of many people. And when people look up to you, it's your responsibility not to hurt the feelings. Well Rachael accepted the invitation and started preparing for the Seminar.

On the seminar day, there were four other speakers along with her and all of them were from different background. It was a privilege to share the stage with such talented successful women. She was happy that she will get to learn new things from such distinguished guests who were not only senior to her in age but in experience as well. She was the first one to speak and was a little nervous as that was her first seminar as a speaker. Well she fumbled initially but then she became more confident and was unstoppable. She spoke on the topic based on her experience of being woman…. Simple things of life and how simple things in life (if not taken care properly) can become bigger issue later.

Now was the time for another speaker to take the stage. When the seminar ended she was surprised to hear the opinion of other speakers. One of them said “I am surprised how a woman can take care of kids as well as office. I can never imagine myself taking care of my work and family together. I somewhere feel that such women compromise on work and don’t give their 100%. The kind of profile I am in I can never imagine to start family that’s the reason I never got married”. Another one said “Don’t get upset when your boss comment on your lips and say that “ Your lipstick is awesome””….. Well Well !

Let's take the point one by one. The primary role of women in the society/family is to take care of the family. If that’s not true then Why only women have the capacity to undergo  the process of meiosis because Its women role to have kids and take care of them and define the future of the society and country. I am not saying that Women should not work . They should but Family should always be a priority for women. Men and women have defined roles by GOD and it should be followed in that order only. If we try to change things completely it can lead to devastation.

Rakhsita being woman always believed that Women role has to be performed by women and no men can match the role of women . In the similar way Men role should be performed by Men only, No Women can match that. Rachaels  mother and father had defined “role” in shaping her as an individual hence she believed in that logic. People will label Rachael as Orthodox but according to me She is a modern woman and trying to do her duties of life and I am sure one day she will be a successful mother, wife as well as professional.  We have many examples from the corporate world where the  woman is  successful mother as well as professional. It's not difficult and can be easily achieved with the help of family members ,colleagues & mentors. That’s the reason it's very important to marry the right person/Choose the right organisation….A person/organisation who can understand you, help you grow as an individual. Climbing the corporate ladder, or juggling between the companies or straightway starting of your own … Whatever way one has chosen, it doesn’t matter… what matters is the success of each role play. Women have to plan their house chores as well as office chores in a more professional way and nothing seems impossible. Planning is the core of everything whether its personal or professional life.

Coming to the second statement of speaker “Don’t get upset when your boss comment on your lips and say that “ Your lipstick is awesome”…. It is a concern and matter to get upset. It depends on the individual. Some women like such compliments, some don’t... so men should be very careful before making such statement. Men should better avoid making such loose statement. Everyone appreciates beauty but when this appreciation becomes habit for men and is shown to every second women then its a matter of concern as the next step will be to visualize women in "Ooh la la" way…. Infatuation at any age is bad but if its limited to healthy flirting then it's absolutely fine.  Now the issue is if you don’t appreciate such statement you will be termed as “ Arrogant”. Don’t bother what people say, DO what you feel is right and appreciate the behavior if you find it ok. If not then ask the person ( whatever position the person holds) in a polite manner to “ SHUT UP”

Someone rightly said “ Women's role is to unite the house”….. Women are known as “Female”… The word itself has “Iron” in it which means that women are strong, intelligent and ready to take the  world. Reach the top but don’t forget the primary responsibility of “Being Woman” !

*Image Credits : Creative Commons.

Saamna - The Real Story

Empowerment – Empowerment is a strong word and we talk in today’s world with respect to Women Empowerment, Employee Empowerment…. Empowerment is what young job aspirants are looking for in organizations. More than monetary rewards, it is the feeling that employee “owns” the job that motivates him or her nowadays. Empowered employees are energetic and passionate, however in a middle level position when “Boss” empowers the subordinate, it always doesn’t mean that  “Boss” is doing to make the subordinate feel empowered but it can also mean that he is incapable of handling the work and has chosen the best brain to help him so that he can show his work to seniors by simply erasing the employee name from the document .

So how to handle such Idiotic, mad boss… here presenting the story of Saamna a middle level manager.

One fine day Saamna got a call from an HR firm stating “ Will you be interested in joining ABC company” ? She said “ No” because she had heard that Women are not treated well by ABC company. After few days she was surprised to get call from the Head marketing of the same organization called “ Nilesh Kumar”. First of all she was shocked and taken aback that how “Nilesh” got her number and secondly Why is he calling her… This was the first time in her life when Head marketing was calling her directly without any appointment. However she gave him ear… Nilesh tried to persuade her to join the organization and ensured her that she will be treated well.

After the call he started texting her. She was shocked and didn’t know how to handle the person like him…. So she gave it a thought and tried to ignore the messages. However she had a strong feeling that someone else is controlling this entire act ( The stupid act of Head marketing) so to get into deeper she also got friendly on sms but things were still not clear as whose brain is behind all this activity.

 One day she got the call from HR that she has been finalized and she had to join on x day. So finally she joined. Nilesh tried to get close to her and shared his personal life. She easily could have said “ FO” but he was her boss and she had to think smartly so she hatched the plan in her mind.

Problem statement – Nilesh was mentally sick and needed a shoulder to cry as he was undergoing Divorce in his personal life.

To know about the person who is asking him to get friendly with Saamna.

Solution : For problem statement 1 she needed someone who can become Nilesh friend so she zeroed in on a girl who was always checking guys and was known as “Saana” by some of her friends.  So this “Saana” was best mach for him as there was lot of similarity between Nilesh and “Saana”.

1. Both of them can't stick to one person.

2. Both of them had the habit to show off and were masters in manipulating the situation. Both of them were born liars. Lie was in their blood. Both had the bad family background.

3. Both of them had little brain and were divorced. Nilesh was divorced twice whereas “Saana” was divorced once.

So she thought of introducing them to each other because by doing that she will be at peace and Nilesh will stop harassing her and both Nilesh & Saamna will be able to concentrate on work and will have peaceful professional life. Sammna was professional enough to handle the work and she just wished that Nilesh let her work peacefully which was beneficial for the organisation as well as for her. It would have been the WIN WIN situation for both the organisation and for her.   She once thought of sharing this with senior management of the organization but  she was told that senior management doesn’t hold good opinion about her, however she tried once sharing with senior management but got cold vibes. One of the option was to tell his wife but she was shocked to hear Nilesh opinion about his wife. He told her that she had cancer once and she goes out with guys. Her English is poor. She drinks and smokes. She is on depression pills. Saamna thought the person who had no respect for his wife will never make her life happy. In fact she will become more depressed if she stays with person like Nilesh.

So in front of her there was only one option which was good for the organization as well as for her  that she get him friendly with that “Saana” so that he remains busy with her and she gets peace in life and they as team were able to deliver the project on time. So she introduced him to her . Life was going good till the time Nilesh behavior became worse ( A man ego that how a woman can say no to him). One day when Nilesh misbehaved with her she thought of teaching him lesson for life because there is saying “When we ignore a wrong, we also become part of the wrong” so she decided that she will leave that organization only after  teaching him lesson for life.

She took the matter to HR and she moved on in life. One month later she got call from a lady stating that “Saana” was sleeping with her husband and she needed Saamna’s help in meeting “Saana” as “Saana” was ignoring her calls. She mailed her the videos of her husband and Saana in a compromising position. She also got the shock of her life when she was told that Saamna account was hacked and few mails were sent using her account to show the world the different story. Saamna could have gone to the police but she thought this situation was like mud, if one throws a stone then some mud will be on her as well. So like a sensible girl she thought of ignoring everything. Time will tell who is what and you can't hide the truth for long.

So finally her plan worked. Both got together, the organization came to know the real Nilesh, and she saved his wife life as well.

When the life showed her right vs. wrong , she chose the right even for that her image was at stake and she had to leave the organization on a bad note. Leaving on a bad note was less painful than to suffer from daily harassment. One mistake which Saamna made that she heard the personal story of Nilesh. According to me she should not have given the ear to Nilesh story but her inquisitive nature and a thought that someone is behind her stupid boss action and her thinking that the organisation is like family, made her hear the story. She learned a big lesson that the Organisation is not family and one should never hear the personal story of anyone or never try to help anyone.

When I heard the above story I was moved and proud of being a woman and only a woman can make such sensible judgment .  Hope you all agree that Saamna was a good decision maker and did the best in that particular situation. There is lot to learn from the above story and the fact that empowerment always doesn't mean that Boss is empowering subordinate to give him/her the power of decision making and allowing the employees to say on how things are to be done.... Empowerment needs to be implemented with caution and senior management should be able to differentiate between empowerment and Bosses non performance. Empowerment doesnt work at the place where boss have highly inflated egos and are self centered. When boss look for secured but not challenging jobs, empowerment sounds hollow.

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